The Fantasy Finish Line

Ah, December. When the air chills, smells of burning wood waft by, we warm our toes by the fire and watch our fantasy dreams die a slow death. As you recall, I'm in three leagues this year. In two of those leagues, I finished in first place while in the third league, I finished dead last. We'll forget about this third league for purposes of this post.

In my ESPN PPR league, I owned the regular season, finishing at 11-2 with the second-highest scoring team (highest scoring team was 5 points ahead of me). Second place was a middling 8-4-1, third was 7-5-1, and fourth was 6-5-2. Of course, the fourth place team also happened to be the highest-scoring team in our league, captained by Anant. Going into our playoff matchup, I was projected to beat him 171-159 or something. Both our teams come down with significant diarrhea on Sunday, taking us into the MNF matchup at 82-79 in my favor. He has Andre Johnson and Shayne Graham going, I have Wes Welker and Stephen Gostkowski going. In the first quarter, the Pats score a shitload of points, Welker has 3 catches for 52 yards, Gostkowski bangs through 3 extra points, and I am well on my way. But then the game quickly turns heavily in Anant's favor. Namely, it becomes a throw-fest for the Texans and a run-out-the-clock/throw-to-all-Pats-not-named-Welker-fest for the Pats. Before I know it, Andre Johnson has 8 catches for 95 yards and Shayne Graham has booted in two garbage XPs and Wes Welker hasn't sniffed the ball since the first quarter. And the Pats' offense is TOO good, never stalling in FG range for Gostkowski to save me with a FG; and the game soon gets TOO out of hand, so that the Pats, should they stall in FG range, wouldn't even kick a FG anyway. So in the end, I lose by 2 points, 98-96. Great week for my team to go out and log its worst scoring week of the year, by far. Thanks guys, I didn't need the $250 prize money. My only consolation is that I get to play Bashon in the third-place game, and his team includes RG3, Percy Harvin, Willis McGahee, and Rob Gronkowski, aka "the best injured reserve EVER." Thank god they are all terribly injured, so he'll be starting Cecil Shorts against me. My team is still strong--Drew Brees, Jamaal Charles, Frank Gore, AJ Green, Wes Welker, Miles Austin/Greg Jennings at flex, Jason Witten, 49ers D, Gostkowski at K. In a pinch, I've got Peyton Manning to fill in at QB and Danny Amendola for a flex. How the F am I out of this thing??

In my Yahoo! non-PPR league, our playoffs start this coming week and I am somehow still in first place after limping into the playoffs on a three-game losing streak. Luckily, all the other guys limped in on bad runs as well, except for one team which raged back from a 4-6 record to win four in a row thanks to strategic waiver wire additions of Bryce Brown and Knowshon Moreno. This is the first league I've ever been in where every team in the playoffs has the same record. It truly is a toss-up. Except that I'm starting Carson Palmer, Steven Jackson, and Brandon Myers. So that sucks. And in keeping with the fratricide theme, I will be matched up against my brother in this league for the semifinal matchup. There's a glimmer of hope, but he's got Colston and Sproles going in a clear "F You" game for the Saints back at the SuperDome. And he might get LeSean McCoy back this week. Could get ugly. My hopes are not high here, but hey, it's anyone's guess.

So the goal of every fantasy year for me is to break even or make a bit of money. Right now, I'm in for $120. The two teams I mention above are in my $50 leagues, while the $20 league was lost in week one when Greg Jennings and Fred Jackson went down. So that's good at least. If I can eke out a third-place finish in the ESPN league ($50) and a second-place ($150) or first-place ($300) finish in the Yahoo! league, I'm looking pretty solid. Of course, I could finish in fourth place in both leagues and be out $120. Such is the beauty and the curse of fantasy football. Stay tuned for updates!

You Are All Peasants

Because I just got Diamond Medallion status on Delta Air Lines. Bow to me!

Burgers! Burgers! Burgers!

Those of you who know me, you know what I like. A good NFL Sunday at home, a nice crisp beer on a sunny day, a smoky glass of scotch on a cold night, Mexican food any time, and every now and then, a good ol' hamburger.

In a heated discussion over the best burgers we've ever eaten, my good friend Sam Diablo thought it a great idea that I blog on my thoughts about hamburgers. So I'm going to do it. Specifically, I'm going to tell you about the five best hamburgers I've ever had.

A Note to the Wise: Every hamburger eater is different, and I respect that. We all have different wants, needs, likes and dislikes when it comes to what's on the plate and between the buns. So think what you will about my choices here, but that is just what they are--MY choices, fueled and motivated by a lifetime of eating rather mundane, boring, overly ambitious or just plain shitty hamburgers, in my opinion. With that, we'll get on with it.

A truly good hamburger needs to score highly on three fronts: ingredients, execution, and, to borrow a phrase from Fiji Water, "mouth feel." A good side doesn't hurt, but we're here to talk about burgers, not the entire meal.

Personally, on ingredients, I like a high-quality, probably ridiculously fatty beef like Kobe (Angus is fine too). Plain ol' chuck just doesn't do it for me. Although I am no cheese connoisseur, I do like a nice cheese on my beef--an aged Vermont cheddar, a sharp, salty blue, or something similarly bold and noticeable. For toppings, I am generally agnostic. The only reason I want toppings is to add a small variation in taste, texture and temperature to offset the beef and cheese (like a crisp sliver of onion or tomato or pickle or of course, a couple slices of bacon). Condiments, again, I'm pretty ok with a lot of stuff--plain ol' mayo, mustard and ketchup is fantastic. This is generally where restaurants get derailed--they throw some ill-conceived garlic aioli or IPA-infused chipotle habanero (insert culinary buzzword) mustard on there that ends up overpowering everything else. The condiment should simply be what the word is intended to mean--an enhancer, not a feature. Not that I'm against fancy mustards, but it should be subtle, not in my face. Finally, there's the bread. Here is where I'm surprised to say a ton of places go horribly wrong. Some places offer a "burger" on "five-grain bread" which is basically sliced bread like you get at the store. To me, this is a flat cooktop and a couple Roll Tide shirts away from being a "Patty Melt" at the "Waffle House." Ok? THIS IS NOT A BURGER. Others will serve a burger on the impenetrable-by-teeth ciabatta bread. Again, get the f*ck out of here. If I literally have to recruit my neck muscles to help tear bread away from itself, it's game over. For my money, the bread needs to be a roll or bun, not sliced bread; it also needs to be soft--I don't want to have to bite so hard into the bun that everything inside slips out the other end while I still haven't made a dent in the bread. Brioche bread, now that's nice.

Even when some restaurants get the ingredients right, the execution falls flat. Perhaps the veggies are so wet that the whole thing becomes a soggy mess, or the secret sauce is slathered on so sloppily it's impossible to eat without putting your shirt cuffs at risk. Eating the burger should be a seamless process. A bite should be cleanly taken from the burger while leaving the rest intact. Anything less is extremely annoying and all too common. Also, done-ness is something that restaurants more often get wrong than they get right. If I order my burger medium, there should be pink in the middle and the burger should be hot. It shouldn't be red and cold in the middle surrounded by a millimeter of gray. While I'm aware that I eat and love meat, I don't need to be reminded that this thing was once bleeding and apparently, still is. Even if they get the meat right, some places eff up on the veggies. I don't need a tomato with a whitish-green center on my burger. Please, give me a nice, ripe, soft, flavorful tomato! Is that so much to ask? Easy fixes, people!

Finally, the be-all and end-all of tests, the mouth feel. This concept involves the "experience" of eating the burger. This blogger's opinion is that a bite into a burger should be effortless--your teeth should sink easily into the bread and beyond and meet gloriously in the slightly pink center. No need to tear away with my teeth, no worrying about the burger shitting ingredients out the other end. No ingredient should stand out too much, but all of them should harmonize in a well-conducted symphony of flavor featuring the beef (did I just make a classical music reference while writing about eating a piece of beef? Why yes, yes I did!). Soft, melty, uniform feel anchored by the beef and highlighted by distinct notes of every flavor that has gone in-- as with a Christmas tree and its ornaments, the beef should be decorated but not lost in the act (seasonal metaphor, check!). And if the burger is a good one, the bites-within-the-bite should be multidimensional. "Whoa! I just got a little bit of pickle. Whoa! There's the sharp vermont cheddar! OOH! BACON!" Each bite should not feel like work followed by reconstruction and re-positioning of the bun, patty, lettuce, bacon, etc. Rather, each bite should be an invitation to come again. The burger should remain intact--one shouldn't feel compelled to hold the burger the entire meal for fear it will disintegrate; rather, one should comfortably be able to set the burger down, trust that it will not fall apart, and have a french fry and a swig of beer. Self-contained, well-crafted burgers are a thing of beauty. And these are the few that have topped my list:

#5. Tie: Cheeseburger - Five Guys Burgers and Fries; SuperSonic Double Cheeseburger - Sonic, America's Drive-In

What? You thought TheRanga was above putting fast-food burgers in his top five? Well think again! While the average person with my education scoffs at America's fast food culture, I embrace it. Nay, I LOVE it. And there's nothing like a good old-fashioned, plain-vanilla cheeseburger that just feels and tastes like baseball, pickup trucks and dirty blue jeans. Five Guys gets major points for eliciting a smoky "cookout" flavor in its burgers with surprisingly fresh toppings. Sonic gets props for crafting a nearly perfect burger by all three of my litmus tests.

#4. The Melvyn - Melvyn's Restaurant, Monroe, LA

I had this burger just once in my entire life, and it makes the list simply because I remember it. I ate it in 1991 after a soccer game and still remember it like it was last week. Melvyn's is a little greasy spoon in my hometown--a dimly lit, fully carpeted dive replete with an old-fashioned jukebox, duct-tape enhanced barstools and low-hanging pool table lights shrouded in cigarette smoke and racism. When you eat at Melvyn's, your food comes in a styrofoam box. In my styrofoam box was one of the greasiest, most beautiful  sights TheLittleRanga had ever beheld. I actually remember a small pool of grease collecting in the corner of the box, because yes, I dipped my fries in that grease. A legitimately HUGE piece of beef, kind of crispy on the outside but beautifully soft on the inside, accompanied by condiments that perfectly matched the patty--a HUGE tomato and a HUGE bun and a HUGE piece of cheddar cheese. Of course, I was in third grade and probably weighed 55 lbs, so there may be a scaling issue at play here. But this was one well-crafted burger that still endures, even though this fine establishment does not.

#3. NY Steakhouse Burger - Prime 16, New Haven, CT

This comes extremely close to my idea of the perfect burger. 8 oz. of quality beef topped with bleu cheese, wilted spinach, fried onion strings and two crisp, tangy pickles. Where it misses: I'd love some hint of a sweet  sauce to complement the whole thing, like a jam/compote and perhaps some bacon; also, consistency is an issue at Prime 16, where the burger sometimes ends up a bit dry--I've had this burger probably five times, and only twice has it blown me away. However, when done right, it's glorious and rivals #1 on this list.

#2. FO Burger - Father's Office, Los Angeles, CA

This burger helped solidify my entire philosophy on what makes a good burger. Father's Office is so cock-sure that they got it right, they won't even let you make changes to their burger (or any food, for that matter; maybe it's arrogance, rather than cock-sureness). Anyway, while most of L.A. is up in arms about their rigidity, I'm fully on board. I think they use Kobe beef, but I could be wrong. They garnish it with bleu cheese, caramelized onions, crisp arugula, and some sort of secret sauce that perfectly answers the taste buds' call for something sweet. This burger is so glorious and easy to eat that when you're done, you forgot where the time went. This burger made such an impression on me that TheWife, a vegetarian who thrives on audibles when ordering food, took me there for my bday. I love you, TheWife.

#1. Backdraft Burger - The Wing Dome, Kirkland, WA

The last place I would expect to find a burger that tastes this good is at a place that specializes in wings. This one wins on the concept alone, because the concept is fantastic. Kobe beef, wing sauce, bleu cheese, lettuce, tomato, pickle, onion and that's about it. This one is not clean and drips all over the place, but I'm willing to look past that because it tastes unbelievable. I think the human body is only capable of taking this one down once a year, so plan carefully.  Along with the extra crispy waffle fries that the Wing Dome serves up, this one is a 100% winner and my choice for best burger ever.

College Basketball (And More) Is Here!

Hey folks, it seems college basketball season has gotten off to a roaring start, what with ESPN's tip-off marathon last night that was capped off by two great games, Michigan State vs. Kansas and Kentucky vs. Duke. If you remember, last year I attended the Champions Classic featuring these same four teams at Madison Square Garden and was unfortunately heckled by a redneck from Kentucky, who told me to "Go back to Arabia" when I cheered loudly for Coach K's 903rd win. Well, it's been a year coming, but now I can finally tell that guy to shove his bigotry and Duke's 75-68 win up his ass.

I was pleasantly surprised at how poised Duke looked last night. I'm guessing having three seniors on the squad helps, but usually we don't look so composed this early in the season. Granted, Duke frequently gets the big early-season wins to jack up its RPI and then disappoint in March, but this time seemed a bit different. Ball handling was solid (only 8 turnovers on the game, I believe), FG%, 3PT% and defense all looked pretty good too. Of course, Kentucky burned Duke on a bunch of give-and-go alley-oops and other such ridiculous athletic feats that only they can do. But I was proud of how Duke took every thunderous dunk by Kentucky (and the ensuing rowdiness of the crowd) and calmly brought the ball down and almost effortlessly placed it in the bucket at the other end. Mostly, it was Seth Curry, who seems to have blossomed into a very complete player over the last year. We knew he was good, but yesterday he showcased more than his usual shooting prowess we've grown used to. He had the handle, he had the drives, he had the head fakes, and he had his usual staunch defending (and apparently he can dunk too!). And when it came time for big plays to be made in crunch time, Curry was our man. Surely as all Duke fans (and many players, it seems) were tightening up their sphincters after letting UK go on a 9-0 run in the waning minutes, Curry calmly went about his business--asking for the ball, taking what was given to him, and knocking down the big shots when we needed. Whether it was a deft floater in traffic or a head-fake to get the monster Nerlens Noel off his feet for a quick up and in, Curry found the zone. And oh yeah, a perfect night at the free throw line didn't hurt either, especially seeing how many FT's Duke had left on the table throughout the game. All in all, a great and surprisingly composed effort from the Blue Devils last night. That being said, I don't want to see Kentucky in March. That team will be VERY good.

Moving on, it looks like the Saints are trying to make a go of it this season. A favorable matchup at Oakland this weekend could see a Saints victory and a .500 mark on the season after a dismal 0-4 start. I like the fire the team is showing, but somehow I wonder if all this means is that we go 8-8, miss the playoffs, and have the 18th pick in the draft next year. Who knows. But until we do, I'm rooting for 11-5 and a wild card spot! If the D can get its act together, I do believe the Saints are capable of beating anyone in the league. Especially in the Superdome. Which, incidentally, is where the Super Bowl will be played this year. Verrrry interesting...

Fantasy update! In my three leagues, I currently rank 1st out of 8, 1st out of 10, and 10th out of 12. Yeah, the 10th place is just a bad, bad situation. 12-man league, ridiculously odd scoring system (a 50-yard play gets a 5-point bonus for being 50 yards. WHAT?), two big injuries and a conspicuous no-show from my top three draft picks--it's all just bad. And of course, by virtue of being a 12-man league, there is ZERO waiver wire depth. I've spent the season just picking up injured guys in the hopes they will heal quickly and return to action. And I've been wrong on just about every account. At least in the other leagues I am well-positioned to hopefully be in the money when it's all said and done. But we'll see.

What else--the CrossFitting has been going very well. I graduated into the "intermediate" level of athletic development at my gym. It's meaningless by all accounts, but was nice to have a goal to work towards when I joined the gym and then see that goal reached. Here's what I had to accomplish (see if you can do it too!):

- 70 air squats in 2 minutes
- 8 split squats per leg holding a 25lb dumbbell in each hand (15% of body weight in each hand basically)
- 25 unbroken push ups, chest chin and stomach all the way to the floor on each rep
- 5 strict dips
- 6 dumbbell shoulder press with a 25lb dumbbell in each hand (15% of body weight per hand again)
- 45 second static hang from a pull up bar
- 5 strict pull ups
- 90 second side bridge per side
- 15 knees to elbows on the pull-up bar
- 2 minute Sorensen test (basically holding a back extension at the top for 2 minutes)
- 4 minute 800 meter run
- 8 minute 1 mile run
- 1:55 to row 500 meters
- 100 single jump ropes unbroken
- 1 rope climb

Most of that stuff was doable the day I got to the gym. But the rope climb, pull-ups and knees to elbows prevented me from completing all the tests in one day. At least now, I can do a bunch of pull ups and my core is a lot stronger, and that has helped me into the intermediate level. Now, I have to aim for the advanced level, and that shit is serious. Here is what I am shooting for now:

- Back squat 150% of body weight for 1 rep
- Front squat 127% of body weight for 1 rep
- 8 split squats per leg holding a 50lb dumbbell in each hand (28% body weight)
- Close grip bench press 100% of body weight for 1 rep
- Weighted dip with 55% of body weight for 1 rep
- 6 dumbbell shoulder press with a 50lb dumbbell in each hand (29% of body weight)
- 30 pull ups
- Weighted pull up with 55% of body weight for 1 rep
- 30 second L-sit on parallel dip bars
- 20 hanging straight leg raises from pull up bar
- Deadlift 187% of body weight for 1 rep
- 3 minute 800 meter run
- 6:10 1 mile run
- 1:34 to row 500 meters
- Power clean 100% of body weight for 1 rep
- Power snatch 75% of body weight for 1 rep
- 50 consecutive double unders with the jump rope

As you can see, the list of requirements is very different, and very tough. Some of these I already have in the bag, like the shoulder press and deadlift and potentially both running tests, but others will require a LOT of work. The nice thing is, they are all there as goals for me, and hopefully in the next few months I can get very close to achieving them all and generally being more fit. Weight is still right in the 176-178 range. My eating has not been as strict as it should be, but I'll try and grind through the holiday season with minimal cheats. Let's see how it goes!

DUIs and DIYs

Hey folks, back from a long vacation in the Funroe with TheWife, where we watched BigSis get engaged (Congrats, BigSis!). Came back to a house full of smelly water (I'll get to that). But first, a small snippet from the time back home.

One night, Ro goes out to meet a friend for a burger and a beer. Well, the beer turned into three beers over about a two and a half hour span. Ever the ethical, responsible older brother, Ro texts me and says he may need me and Dad to come get him in case he has a couple more. Since the bar is not even 10 minutes away, it's easy for Dad and me to jump in the car and go get him. So about an hour later, we head off to get him. As he walks out of the bar, he says "Thanks for getting me guys, but really, it's unnecessary! I'm fine." And by all accounts, he looks and sounds fine. Alas, as we are there, we say "Whatever." I jump in his car and he gets in the passenger seat, while Dad heads back home in the other car.

Not 100 feet after I pull out of the bar, I see those nightmarish flashing blue and red lights in my rear view and a cop is pulling me over. "Sheeiiiit," Ro says. "The brake light is out in the back." Brake light? That doesn't seem like a big deal to me. I roll down the window and look in the side view mirror to see a cop saying, "Could you please come back here and bring your license?" So I, in my flip flops and shorts and raggedy t-shirt, jump out. The cop tells me my brake light is out and then squints at me. Clearly, he's trying to gauge whether or not I am drunk. He then asks for my license, which is a Connecticut license. On this particular day, I am clean-shaven, so clearly I look A) Nothing like my license, where I can pass for some member of a splinter cell, and B) 15. Before he even says anything, I tell him, "This is my father's vehicle. I'm just picking up my brother from Enoch's. I don't actually live here--just in town for a week." With that, he says "Ok, just get that light fixed" and sends me on my way. It occurs to me that this guy parks outside Enoch's on 2-for-1 burgers and beers night, just waiting to pounce on some unsuspecting prat driving home.

I can only imagine what might have happened if Ro hadn't texted, if we hadn't gone to get him, if we hadn't decided to drive him anyway when he said he was ok. Could have been an ooey, gooey, DUI situation. Who knows--Ro is 6'2", 230, so I doubt 3 beers in three hours had him blowing a .08, but that's the problem. We just don't know where the line is, and while he likely wasn't over the limit, he COULD have been. So there it is--lesson learned: whenever in doubt, get a DD; also, buy a keychain breathalyzer for such situations, but mostly just as a really cool party toy.

Anyway, TheWife and I get back to the Hamdens, where she promptly jumps in the shower while I do separate business in a separate bathroom, if you get my drift. When I head back upstairs to unpack my suitcase, I meet a seriously noxious smell in the hallway. Sulfury, rotten egg like smell. Right away, I know it is our water. You see, we have well water here, and for some reason, without a proper level of maintenance, it gets super stinky. It's not unhealthy per se, but aesthetically unpleasing. Who wants to smell putrid rotten eggs while showering?

Anyway, this water issue has been my HouseNemesis for the last 2.5 years. I've spent hundreds of dollars having the well water people come here to chlorinate the well, test the water for bacteria, refresh the potassium permanganate water softener that we use in our greensand filter system. All in an effort to figure out what the hell is going on with our water. And the "experts" at the water well company have increasingly had no clue what was going on--the first go around, it was, "Oh, you need more potassium permanganate for your filtration system."  That sounded like something I have no idea about, and therefore, correct. So I was happy. Then the smell returned, with a system full of PotPerm. This time, they said, "Maybe there's bacteria in your well." I agreed--something foreign was making the water smell. So yes, let's spend $200 on chlorinating the well and conducting lab tests to figure it out. Lab tests came back negative. But the chlorination seemed to do the trick, so we were back in good shape. Then it happened again. This time, they said, "You're not cleaning out your filtration system properly." So the guy took an entire crock of fresh PotPerm (which costs $45) and dumped it out in the MIDDLE OF MY LAWN THAT MOTHER F#*&ER. Completely burns that part of the lawn while he rinses out the crock with a hose (for those of you unfamiliar, TheRanga loves his lawn as much as he loves TheWife; well, maybe not, but I spend equal amounts of time taking care of them and getting annoyed that they don't do what I want). Then this a-hole charged me $50 for a new batch of PotPerm and $150 for his labor, because he was at the house doing all his turning on and off of taps for an hour and a half. It's infuriating, actually--every time they come, they just run tests that cost $200 and say "I'm not really sure what the problem is."

So this time, with the water stinking to high heaven, I say, "F the water well company!" and embark on some astute Googling of my own. And you know what? I figured that shit out! Do I work at a water well company? NO! Have I worked at a water well company for 40 years, like these idiots who come to the house? NO! But Google, oh Google, how you do me so right. Apparently, my problem was with the water heater (you know this because the smell only occurs with hot water). When a water heater is left unused for an extended period of time (in this case, 10 days), certain bacteria that exist in the water are allowed to multiply, aided by the cozy 120 degree environment of the water, the lack of disturbance, and free sexifying electrons floating around in the water from the magnesium anode that serves as an anti-corrosive agent inside the heater (the magnesium protects the heater itself from corroding and rusting inside, but does release electrons that the bacteria feed off of. I know, you care, so I explain. I'm here all week). So, I shocked those bacteria mofos to hell and back. Ran hot water from the bathtub this morning until no hot water remained. Then set the water heater up to a balmy 160 (which is SUPER unsafe for consumption at home, so this was just for shocking those little bastards). Left it for four hours while I ate breakfast, did some work, CrossFitted, and ran some errands. After the four hours, ran the bathtub again, and VOILA, no smell whatsoever. So here I am, out $600 or more over the last few years wondering about the damn water situation, with all the guys at the well company pointing their palms to heaven and saying "I don't know," and all it took was maxing out the water heater to kill off the little guys.

Anyway, this is clearly not the sexiest DIY I've done, but I did learn a big lesson that, when used properly, will make living in this house much more pleasant. You see, in the South, the concept of well water is completely foreign, so I came into this situation totally unprepared and unable to handle the curves that our well water so deftly throws my way. 2.5 years in, I still had no idea. So finally conquering what had felt like my Waterloo (HA! get it?!?!) feels GREAT! And THAT friends, is why you DIY!

PEACE!

The Backslide

I know I've been gone a while. But it feels like every blog post starts with my apologizing for the lack of blog posts. Gets kind of annoying, right? Sorry. Moving on.

Last couple of months have been jam-packed with travel. Weddings galore, work trips, weekend getaways, you name it, we've been there. It's been fun, that's fo sho, but man, I feel like today is the first day in months that I'm just sitting at the house and unwinding. But I can't get too comfy, I have a conference in NYC on Monday/Tuesday and then two business trips in October, one in November, and an India trip in December. The Medallion counter is at 120k. 5k til diamond. Championship!

Speaking of championship, we're fully into the fantasy football swing of things. This year, unlike the many years prior, I have entered myself into three leagues. Three leagues is kind of a pain. I've been terrible at keeping track of all the bye weeks and making my moves on the waiver wire, etc. I fret that my mere presence in three leagues will ultimately spell my downfall. Every Sunday, my rooting interests are waaaay too wide to ever be fully on top of. At any one given time, I have some 7-8 guys going on the three different teams, and usually, a guy I own in one league is a guy I'm going against in another league. So there's the whole conflict of interest issue. I don't know. It's too much. That being said, Week 1 I went 1-2 after losing Fred Jackson and Greg Jennings in my Yale league (that's the lowest money league, and I may go winless there. Through two weeks, I have scored 180 points. Another guy in my league put up 165 THIS WEEK). Week 2 treated me a bit better--went 2-1 and the one loss was by 3 points. A Matt Bryant FG would have put me over the top. So sad. Instead of waxing poetic about my woes, some pre-season quotes from yours truly that may give you a glimpse of my lot in fantasyland:

"Man, Dexter McCluster is going to be legit this year. I need to make sure I draft him in every league I'm in."
"Two of my leagues are PPR leagues. Wes Welker? First Round? Yes, Please!"
"Darren Sproles? Eh, whatever. Julio Jones? Eh, whatever."
"Fred Jackson was a beast last year. I need to make sure he is on my team. Also, that guy Steven Jackson is awesome. I should draft him comically early in two of my leagues."
"Jamaal Charles looks fantastic. I am going to take him instead of Darren Sproles in my PPR, high money league. Sure he's coming off a torn ACL, but he USED to be awesome."
"This is going to be Jake Locker's year. I can feel it."
"I think Michael Vick's turnover issues have been solved."

And the icing on the cake, courtesy of Bashon:

"Dude, bench Welker and start McCluster. You start McCluster, you'll win your game."

Well...shit.

Thursday Night Football update: I sneakily put in waiver wire claims in a couple of my leagues for Andre Brown of the New York Giants this week. He adroitly spelled Ahmad Bradshaw last week, who came out with a neck sprain. Figuring that I could at least squeeze one week out of Brown (because things like sprained necks in the NFL magically heal in less than two weeks), I snatched him up. Good work, right? The guy right now has like 90 yards and a TD at halftime. In fact, a tweet:

	ESPN Stats & Info (@ESPNStatsInfo)
9/20/12, 8:14 PM Andre Brown had 77 rush yards in 1st quarter, the most 1st-quarter rush yards by a Giants player since Tiki Barber in 2005

Only problem is, I was so busy conversing with TheWife over dinner that I forgot today was Thursday and that the NYG were going at 8:30. Of course, when I realize this, it's 8:41. So here I am staring at my benched Andre Brown with 16 points at the half while McCluster is projected to get me 7 points against the SAINTS! THE F@#&ING SAINTS WHO GIVE UP 500 YARDS A GAME!! DOESN'T EVERYONE SCORE 20 POINTS AGAINST THE SAINTS??? I HATE FANTASY FOOTBALL.

Anyway, enough fantasy football. The last few weeks of intense travel have also seen me jump off the Paleo bandwagon with gusto for some reason. I rediscovered the joys of pizza, taco bell, spicy basil chicken, pad thai, chicken and rice, meatball subs, Irish car bombs, you name it. Felt like crap for a solid two weeks. But I think I've corrected the backslide and have now logged 5 workouts in the last 7 days and am planning on another one tomorrow. And the diet is back in check. I think I gained like 2 lbs or something. So right now, I'm at 178. I'll get back to the 175 area and then make a concerted push to beat the plateau and get to 170.

That's all for now. Gotta go take the trash out.

Jetlag

Well, here I am at 4:42am after about 95 minutes of tossing and turning in bed. Finally I just caved and got up, caught up on some emails, did some morning reading, checked in on my fantasy football leagues and planned out my day. Something about jetlag reminds me of all those summers as a kid, returning from a long stint in India to visit the grandparents and cousins. There is the comfort and familiarity of being home and getting back to normal life; but it's coupled with the complete novelty of being awake at the oddest hours. Only with jetlag am I understanding exactly what our neighborhood looks like as the sun rises. Only with jetlag am I basking in the fluorescent glow of my laptop in bed while watching Bridesmaids on TV in closed captioning (so as not to wake TheWife, who slumbers angrily and aggressively). Only with jetlag am I standing in front of the fridge at 3:25am deciding between a slice of pizza or a muscle milk shake.

Some people say jetlag sucks, but I'm actually kind of liking it this time, if only for the productivity. Primarily, being up at this time means I can communicate with my team back in India on a real-time basis, which is nice. No more sending emails at 11am and waiting until 1am for a response. Makes work a bit easier to get done. I was in bed by 10 the last two nights and up at 2am yesterday, 3am today. I figure since I'm up, I might as well hit the 5:30am Crossfit class. It's lightly attended and it's great to come home at 6:30am with the day's workout already in the bag. I've got some dry cleaning to pick up, need to hit the grocery store, post office and bank, need to mow the lawn and weed the flower beds, and I need to clean the kitchen. And realistically, I'm thinking I can be done with all this by noon. Just in time for the devastating wave of sleepiness to knock me out on the couch at 2pm. Yesterday, I fell victim to the mid-day jetlag nap, a paralyzing 5-hour session in broad daylight. Just awful.

I think the reason the jetlag is so bad this time is because my trip to India was abbreviated. Just four days there and then right back here. So my body never fully got on India time, and once it was getting there, it needed to get back on US time. I think my body has just said "F it" and  decided to be stuck somewhere between Bermuda and Spain. And like a good Spaniard, I obliged and said yes to the mid-day siesta yesterday. Let's see if I can play some D today, like La Roja, and stay awake.

Ok, I should head out to the gym. Looks like I'm officially at the 175 goal now. Feeling very good. I guess losing nearly 30lbs in a year will do that!

More to come later. Adios.

Let There Be Light!

Whoa! The Ranga Blog has gone darker than TheRanga after a week in the Dominican! Apologies, folks! Been very busy with travel the last few weeks and wasn't able to sit down and put the pen to paper like I wanted to. Even now, I'm squeezing in this blog post from Schiphol Airport in Amsterdam, en route to JFK after another week-long trip to Bombay. But, darkness be gone. Let's go!

Bombay was good, but definitely dry for this time of the year. Apparently the monsoon should be in full effect, and I only saw a shade of a drizzle in my 5 days there. Not good for the crops, not good for farmers' incomes, not good for social stability, not good for politicians, not good for the economy. And it looks like Bombay isn't even getting the brunt of it. Some areas in north and east India (the same areas that triggered the two massive power outages a couple weeks ago, most likely because they were drawing on tons of power to irrigate their parched fields) are running monsoon rains 70% below historical averages. While India can definitely weather another couple of bad monsoons due to good harvests in prior years, the recent trend of disappointing monsoons has to be disconcerting. Is it climate change? Is it all the biomass (read: incinerated cow dung) floating around that is keeping the air from becoming saturated with moisture and dropping to the ground? Who knows. But it starkly highlights how verily one of the world's largest economies sits at the behest of mother nature. On a similar note, the recent drought in the US is creating a similar firestorm here--brace yourselves for higher corn prices, which means higher meat and poultry prices (because American animals aren't fed grass like they should be, but rather loads and loads of corn meal) and probably higher gas prices as the ethanol component of gasoline will become more expensive. And here we thought we were getting a reprieve at the gas pump.

Last time I flew to India, I regaled you with the story of the old gentleman who crabbily yelled at me in some mutilated form of Hindi and English the entire flight (remember, the guy who asked when I boarded, and I thought he was asking when I was born? Yes! That one!). This time, no such humor was involved on TheRanga's flight.

I found my seat, and lo and behold, I was again to be near an elderly gentleman who was so lost that he was actually sitting in my seat. Noticing that the man had a broken arm, I offered him my aisle seat in case he wanted more space, but he declined and moved to his window seat. After we got settled into our seats, we made the usual bit of small talk while taxiing. He asked me where I was headed, what I do, etc. Not wanting to have a one-way conversation, I reciprocated and asked him where he was off to. "St. Louis," he told me. "What will you be doing there? Vacation?" I asked. He paused a second, and then said this:

"About one fortnight ago, my daughter passed away in a bus accident in St. Louis. The bus hit a bridge pillar and we lost her immediately."

Um, holy shit. "Oh my god, I said. How did that happen?" I didn't really know what else to say.

"I believe the bus punctured a tire and veered off the road. We three were in the corner so were most severely injured. My daughter went immediately--she was the only victim on the bus. My wife's left leg was shattered, so she is still in the hospital there. As I've only sustained a broken arm, I took the body back to Mumbai this week for cremation and now will go back to be with my wife until she heals."

He then went on to tell me that his daughter had just finished her first year of a grad program in public health and had studied to be a dentist in India before that. She was 25 years old, he told me. Then he told me the reason he was asking me questions is because he thought maybe I would know US law and offer some advice on if/when/how he can get lawyers involved to seek some damages for the accident. Apparently the bus company has not uttered a word to him or his family throughout these last two weeks. Poor guy, throughout all of this, he also has to worry about finding a lawyer in a completely foreign country to deal with the bus company that just killed his daughter.

Anyway, I did some digging when I got to Amsterdam and sure enough, here it is. It seems that this particular family was seated a level above the driver in the front row of the bus, so the three of them got the brunt of the impact during the accident. What is more heartbreaking is that there are people filing lawsuits already against MegaBus, claiming personal injury and emotional distress from seeing a girl killed, etc. And yet the father of the girl who was killed doesn't even know how to contact a lawyer in the US. Unbelievably sad. And I'm trying to think of a way I can help, but I can't. Anyone, ideas? Perhaps you law-folk?

Sorry to re-open the blog on such a dour note. Upcoming posts will be much rosier, I promise!

Sunday Special

Had quite an eventful last two weeks here. Best friend from back home came to visit me and TheWife for a week spanning July 4 and the ensuing weekend. Had a nice relaxing few days here at the house, punctuated with a Jekyll and Hyde round of golf at a nearby course. Shot SIXTY ONE on the front nine, and then 45 on the back. And that 45 included an 18th-hole blowup for an 8. Play that one like a normal golfer and I'm looking at carding a 41-42 on the back. Feels nice to at least know that type of golf is still somewhere within me. After the down time in CT, we headed to NYC, where we did a mini-tour of restaurants owned/operated by "Chopped" judges (if you're wondering, "Chopped" is a great show on the Food Network). We hit up Butter for dinner on Saturday night and then Stanton Social for brunch on Sunday morning. Both were excellent. Stanton Social has some of the best mac and cheese I've ever tasted. Capped off the weekend with some billiards and ice cream in Soho and headed back to CT.

Spent the last week in CT catching up on work, planning upcoming travel, and trying to atone for the week-long eating binge I allowed myself. Unfortunately, I gained about 2.5-3 lbs and was squarely back at 179-180 at the beginning of the week. Thankfully, though, I hit CrossFit Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday and Saturday while trying to rein in the eating. Eating still hasn't been as paleo as I would like, but that's ok. Back on the horse this week.

Took a nice drive through the tri-state area yesterday to Somerset, NJ for a niece's first birthday party, then made a beautiful sunset drive out to Allentown, PA (actually, Orefield, but who's really keeping track?). I remember an old co-worker from Philadelphia once told me that "Pennsylvania is basically Pittsburgh on one end, Philadelphia on the other end, and Kentucky in between." Well, however you may view it, Pennsylvania really has some picturesque countryside, and TheRanga appreciates that. Some of the landscapes and panoramic valley views on 78 west were simply breathtaking, which made the drive a lot more digestible.

Anyway, got to Orefield, where I met up with JayMoney, Bashon, and Bashali for some good home-cooking and Johnny Walker Black. Stayed up til 4 am just shooting the breeze about nothing in particular. Reminded me of those nights in college where everyone is having so much fun hanging out and knows we should be going to bed soon, but no one wants to be the square who calls it a night. So the night just continues on and on with more stories and jokes until finally someone cracks. Anyway, yours truly over here simply fell asleep while being spoken to and that virtually put the lid on the night. Shameful. Shades of Dad, who is notorious for asking a question and then snoring during the response.

Slept in til 10 this morning, had some delicious pau bhaji, set a new record on Temple Run (5.4 million!), and headed out around 2:30pm. Got back to the house about 7, hugged TheWife, endured the last half of the feature film "It Takes Two" starring Mary Kate and Ashley Olson, which was TheWife's hand-picked selection for her Sunday night entertainment, made an omelet for dinner, and began watching a real people movie called Fargo.

Not much on tap for the week--more work to be done, trips to be planned, workouts to be completed. Big upcoming travel schedule. At this point, here's what I have:

July 20-22: Chicago (TheWife has an interview there)
July 24-29: Seattle/Tacoma (work/wedding to attend)
July 30-August 3: DC, Nashville, St. Louis, Atlanta, NYC (work)
August 10-17: India (work)
August 24-26: Asheville, NC (wedding)
August 31-September 3: Long Island (wedding)

Going to be somewhat exhausting, but hopefully fun!

Finally, the Assault update. Like I said, I'm around 179 unfortunately, but hey, I had a good week, and I still weigh 24 lbs less than I did a year ago, so I'm not too worried about it. More focus on the eating side of the equation this week with some intense workouts built in and I'll be back at 175 in a couple weeks, me thinks.

Current weight: 179.0
Target weight: 175.0
Time frame: 2 weeks

Dirty Decks, Done Dirt Cheap!

Ok, last summer I cleaned out and stained the basement. This summer, I tackled the deck attached to the back of our house. This deck is about 11 years old, but based on its appearance, I'm guessing has never been properly maintained or treated. Here's what I started out with:

As you can see, the wood is pretty weathered and gray and there is no lack of moss that has been beaten into the wood over the years. Years of snow, rain, harsh sunshine, and foot traffic have given the deck this appearance. Here's a bit of a closer look at the discoloration and weathering on the wood:

So, basically, our deck is gross and not fun to hang out on. We spend as little time as possible on the deck. Once the grilling is done, we are inside. I don't like that--the deck should be an attraction, not a repellent. So, on the advice of a neighbor, I took a pressure washer to the deck. I've never used a pressure washer before, but let me tell you, it is fantastic. Just don't put your hand or foot in the line of fire. A pressure washer will absolutely rip the skin off of your body if you F around with it. I turned the thing up to 2200 PSI and blasted the deck for about 3 hours, trying to get every nook and cranny possible. This is what I had the next morning after the pressure bath:

I was amazed at how much difference the pressure washer made. Looking at the wood, it almost looked like a newly constructed deck. Thankfully, the wood was still in decent enough shape to withstand the pressure wash; weaker wood would have splintered and basically fallen apart after the abuse I gave the deck. Here's the second look:

Notice that I was also able to pressure wash all the gunk off the back of the house, so that was a nice bonus. The next morning, I hit the wood with a "wood cleaner," basically a solution that will penetrate the wood and kill any of the moss/algae/gunk that has built up in the wood that I may have missed with the washer. Using the same pump sprayer that I used to stain the basement last year, I saturated the entire deck so that all the surfaces were wet. I let the cleaner stay on for about 20 minutes and then rinsed it all off gently with the pressure washer. 

After the rinse, I gave the deck a full day and a half to dry out in the July heat and then started at it with some semi-transparent, water-based stain. Because I still had some nice wood underneath all that gunk, I didn't want to cover up the  wood grain with a solid stain, so I went semi-transparent to keep the wood's natural beauty in view. Using just a 4 inch brush and a 2 inch brush, I hit the railings and posts first, which took about 3 hours. Clearly, that was the hardest part, because I had to be artful with the brush but also get every tough-to-reach spot imaginable. And every one of those posts you see on the railing? Yeah, I had to get all four sides. That was murder. Anyway, after the railings and posts, I hit the deck floor, which took about 2 hours. Finally, I ended up with this:

And this:

The stain is a bit more orange than I would have liked, but I'm sure with some sun and some wind, a bit of aging on the wood will bring it back to a nice, rich brown. In any event, it looks a thousand times better than it did a week ago, which was the goal. And I'm happy to say we got some serious use out of the deck on July 4th. Now we can grill and drink beer on the deck in peace, without wondering if the deck is somehow going to infect our exposed skin.

And the best part is, the whole project took about three hours of pressure washing, two hours of wood cleaner application and rinsing, and five hours of staining over two and a half days. And the total cost of the project? $80 for the pressure washer, $55 for two gallons of stain, $10 for a gallon of wood cleaner, and $15 for two paintbrushes. So basically $160 for a brand new deck! 

Thank you, I'm here all week.

States of the Union

So I was watching a movie in passing the other day (I think it was Crazy Stupid Love) and a girl says something like "Yes, Maine! I've been to Maine, so that makes six states that I've been to." Then I thought to myself, "Six seems like a very small number." I think I've been to most of the states in the US, and actually spent meaningful time there (ie, not "connected through on a flight"). So I'm going to figure out my number right here, right now. I guess we'll just go alphabetical?

Alabama - Driven through many times and now spending plenty of time there, where TheWife went to high school.

Alaska - Never been.

Arizona - Been a few times with the family to Sedona, and also spent the better part of two weeks in Scottsdale this year for a conference and a wedding.

Arkansas - Used to play in U-10 and U-12 soccer tournaments in Crossett and El Dorado. Amazingly, both quite forgettable places! Also, spent a summer in Arkansas at Camp Ozark, which was basically Vacation Bible School on steroids. Yes, I'm Hindu.

California - Lived there for two years.

Colorado - Plenty of elementary and middle school ski trips to Denver/Winter Park. Recently, even had a business trip there.

Connecticut - Living in it right now.

Delaware - Driven through many times during my drives up and down the east coast. Not sure I've ever spent a night in DE, but I could be wrong. I think driving through an entire state is good enough, though.

Florida - Family vacation destination during childhood, even though we would routinely get turned away as the hurricane du'jour barreled towards us.

Georgia - Visited BigSis when she used to live there, and also now spending tons of time in Atlanta (work) and West Point (TheWife).

Hawaii - Crossed this one off the list last September, when TheWife and I headed to Kauai with my family. Toured the Na'Pali coast, took a helicopter ride over the island, and of course, attended a luau and drank plenty of mai tais. Great time.

Idaho - Drove through the state on my drive from NC to WA in 2004. Stopped in Coeur d'Alene for pho, which was fantastic. And I don't think I've seen a more picturesque place than Coeur d'Alene in my life.

Illinois - Been to Chicago plenty as a kid and recently for work. Also, drove through in 2004. Was blindsided by the amount of aggressively Christian billboards and signposts along the highway. But hey, I guess that's Middle America!

Indiana - Drove through the state in 2004 on the way to WA and I think spent a night outside Indianapolis during that drive. Also, drove through in 2008 on my way from WA to GA. I'm counting it.

Iowa - Drove through in 2004 and in 2008. Both times, I think I covered just about the entire state. Very polite people. Very aggressive Christian signage.

Kansas - Spent a night in Wichita in 2001, when I drove with Ro from LA to WA. Drove through the entire state as well. Fondest memory - getting through KS, stopping in CO to fill gas and noting that Ro's black vehicle was littered with dead bugs and at this point could only be described as "vomit yellow." I asked him, "Why are all the bugs so yellow when they hit the car?" His response: "I don't know? Corn??" It sounds ridiculous, but it has to be the answer, right?

Kentucky - Drove through in 2004 on the way from NC to WA. I distinctly remember passing the lights of Louisville. I'm counting it.

Louisiana - Grew up there.

Maine - Never been.

Maryland - Been to Baltimore many times for work, visiting friends, attending a wedding, etc. Never saw Stringer Bell, though.

Massachusetts - Been to Boston many times, driven through the state on the way up to Vermont.

Michigan - Went to a wedding in 2006 in Colon, MI. Flew into Battle Creek, which is apparently the cereal capital of the world because General Mills is there. Learn something every day! Also, visited a good friend there in Grand Rapids in 2008.

Minnesota - As many times as I've connected through MSP on a Delta flight, I've never actually gotten out and visited the state. And surprisingly, in my many cross-country drives, never touched Minnesota. Can't count it.

Mississippi - Played a few soccer tournaments in Greenville, MS as a kid; attended a writing workshop in Jackson in high school; plenty of garbas attended at Mom and Dad's behest in Jackson; plenty of praying done at the Jackson temple, which was the closest temple to us in Louisiana. And of course, have driven through umpteen times on the way from LA to NC and other places.

Missouri - Visited a friend in St. Louis for a long weekend back in 2006 and also attended my uncle's wedding in St. Louis in 1998. But I think that's about it.

Montana - Drove the entire state in 2004. Entered at mile marker 551 or something astronomical and had to go all the way down to 0, where I hit Idaho. Filled gas in Billings or Bozeman or Butte--can't remember.

Nebraska - Attended a Berkshire Hathaway annual meeting in Omaha, NE in 2008. Also, drove through on many of my cross-country trips.

Nevada - Vegas. Enough said.

New Hampshire - Spent a weekend in Nashua visiting some family friends back in high school. Also, drove through and destroyed a coyote last summer. Count it! Arie 1, New Hampshire Wildlife Protection Services 0.

New Jersey - TheWife has plenty of relatives in NJ. We're probably there once every month or two.

New Mexico - On the drive from Los Angeles to Omaha in 2008, spent a night in Grants, NM. That's about all I can say, other than the customary "drove through the entire state" on a few occasions.

New York - Beyond NYC, drove all through upstate NY in 2008 on my way from Chicago to Cooperstown for the baseball hall of fame. Some of the most beautiful countryside in the entire US, and I think I'm qualified to make that judgment. Straight Last of the Mohicans shit going on off of Route 17. My only regret is that I drove through the Finger Lakes region at night, so couldn't fully savor all of it. Spent a night in Oneonta, visited the baseball hall of fame, saw a Howard Johnson hotel, which I didn't think still existed.

North Carolina - Went to undergrad there. Plenty of visits now that Bashon and Bashali live there as well.

North Dakota - Never been.

Ohio - Spent a long weekend for New Year's this past year in Solon, OH. Also, went to Cincinnati in high school to visit some family friends and visited the football hall of fame in Canton in 2008. Drove through multiple times.

Oklahoma - Drove through the entire state in 2001 on the way from LA to WA with Ro. Again, unfortunately, we drove through at night. From what little we could see, we missed some really tall rock canyons and such. It actually may have been nice to witness in the daylight.

Oregon - Spent a night in Baker City, OR in 2001 before the last leg up to Seattle. Also, headed down to Sand Dunes National Park in 2006 to ride dune buggies, where I drove one off a 20-foot sand dune, somehow survived, and then had to pay $250 to fix the damn thing. Never going back.

Pennsylvania - Visited Pittsburgh and Philly in high school with the family; went to a wedding recently in Philly; accompanied TheWife there for an interview a few months ago. Great food in Philly.

Rhode Island - Visited Providence in high school, when BigSis was thinking of applying to Brown. Did not happen upon Peter Griffin, Adam West, or Quagmire, sadly.

South Carolina - Drove through tons of times on the way from LA to NC and back. Also, spent a weekend there in high school with some family friends who lived outside Greenville.

South Dakota - Drove through the entire state in 2004 on the way to WA. Not much to the land, as it's very flat, but it's peaceful and beautiful. Farmland as far as the eye can see.

Tennessee - Was there recently for some work. Also, drove through a few times in childhood. Good BBQ, but that's about all I know about TN.

Texas - Went there a ton as kids, when we'd go see Texas Rangers games and go ice skating at The Galleria. Also, have driven through the entire state many times and even spent a few days in Harlingen, TX, right on the Mexico border, for some work a few years ago.

Utah - Drove through most of the state in 2001. Saw the Great Salt Lake from the highway. It really looks like a huge basin of salt with some water in it. Apparently, if you live in Seattle, your nearest Chick Fil A is in Ogden, UT. So what if I looked into this when I was living in Seattle? I was just curious! I don't have an addiction!

Vermont - Spent a couple of days in Bretton Woods last summer at the Mount Washington resort. Beautiful but also spooky area. Saw a black bear about 50 yards from me. Hit golf balls at him.

Virginia - Driven through many times, been to Richmond for business and to visit friends, and also spent plenty of time in Alexandria and Fairfax, where some friends used to live.

Washington - Used to live there. Absolutely beautiful, especially in the summer. And the beer! Oh, the beer.

West Virginia - Drove through in 2004. Stopped at a TCBY I think. All I remember were some very windy and steep roads and some extremely thick "Appalachian" accents. Very scenic state to drive through, though.

Wisconsin - Drove through the state on the way to visit a friend in Madison in 2008 and even got a 20k checkup on my car in Fond du Lac. Spent another couple of nights in Milwaukee visiting another friend. Right up there with upstate NY in terms of sheer natural beauty on the drive in southern WI. Odd, I know, but you'd be surprised at some of the rock formations and hills among the vast expanses of flat green farmland there. And Madison is a beautiful, charming little town. Great place. Except for the 6 months surrounding January, I'm guessing.

Wyoming - Spent some family vacations as a kid in Jackson Hole; also spent a night in Gillette in 2004. Big mining town, apparently, and it was about 38 degrees in early May there. Fun fact: apparently WY has more cows than people.

So that leaves me with Alaska, Maine, Minnesota and North Dakota left to visit. Maine is achievable in the near term, seeing as I live in CT. Maybe one day I can convince TheWife to take an Alaskan cruise with me. Minnesota, I have no idea. Maybe a Final Four or Super Bowl will be there one day and I'll make my way there. As for North Dakota, I have no clue. But I'll get it one day and be at 50.

An Actual Blog Post!

So, I've realized that all my blog posts are about me. That is pretty crappy. I guess it is called The Ranga Blog, so it's ok. But really, come on. So on this one, we're changing it up a bit.

TheWife and I were having a conversation the other day and I thought the results would be interesting to post up here. The question posed was: "What are 10 things that, in your mind, every guy should be able to do?" I'll start with my thoughts and finish up with TheWife's. Clearly, we were both thinking a bit differently--I was thinking of things that make a man more manly, while she was thinking in more of a romantic, "make me feel secure" light. Either way, here we go:

1. Swim

This isn't just confined to guys. In my opinion, every person on earth should be able to do this. After all, isn't our planet 75% covered in water? But, it's quite important. I hate swimming, but thank my stars that Mom made me go to weekly lessons with the Speedo-clad Parisian named Pascal at ULM for lessons. There was lots of crying, and the smell of the Natatorium back home still haunts me, but I know how to swim and that's what matters. In fact, UNC deemed this skill so important as to declare it a graduation requirement until 2006, when I guess it became less important. Bottom line: college graduate or not, we should be able to swim, if only for one reason: if our sons or daughters fall into a pool, we should be able to jump in and save them. Astoundingly, there are too many stories of adults whose children wandered into a pool or a pond and either the child drowned or the adult/parent, not knowing how to swim, drowned in an attempt to save the child. Like this tragic story that happened in my hometown.

Also, if that's a bit heavy, swimming makes vacation way fun. So yeah, learn how to swim.

TheRanga's score: Pass (thanks, Mom!)

2. Drive a Stick Shift

Clearly, this is on my list, not TheWife's. Men are into cars, and cars are at their coolest in a manual transmission. It's that simple. The feeling of control, the artistry, the connection between you and the car--I can't imagine anything much better. And I can't even drive a stick. I just know that it looks mad cool when someone can. And I feel emasculated because I can't.

Part and Parcel to this is 2a. Have some automotive knowledge--if you and YourWife are on a date and the car isn't starting, it's nice if you have some inkling of an idea what's going on. Is there water in the carburetor? Is the battery dead? Is the alternator in need of replacement? It's something that would serve every man well, and probably make him a bit sexier to his ladyfriend(s).

TheRanga's score: Fail. Massive Fail. On both accounts.

3. Wear One Suit Very Well

Let's face it. We're all professionals now. And many of you are still single. Any lady will tell you that a man looks just about his best when he's neatly groomed and nattily attired in a great suit. See: Ryan Gosling in just about any suit. The guy knows how to dress, and clearly, the ladies love him. Thus, there is no reason to head to the office Christmas party or charity gala looking like a 7th grader in Dad's suit.

Get a good, worsted wool suit and make sure it fits pretty well off the rack. The shoulders of the jacket should end where your shoulders end, not after they end (you'll look like the aforementioned 7th grader) and not before they end (you'll look like a fatty in a small suit whose arms are bulging out of his jacket sleeves). When buttoned, you should be able to slip your open hand, palm to chest, in between the jacket and your shirt comfortably. Form that hand into a fist, and the jacket should tug firmly at the top button. No fabric bunching around the back of the neck. Follow those pointers, and you have a jacket that fits your chest and shoulders, and that is the most important part. When standing with arms at your side, the bottom of your jacket should be level with the top of your palm--you know, where the calluses are from all your weightlifting. The sleeves should end just the tiniest bit north of the base of your thumb (ie, where your wrist and thumb meet). This will allow an appropriate amount of shirt cuff to show underneath.

If you've gotten this far, you're ready to hit the tailor (and NOT the tailor at the department store where you're buying this suit). Find a real tailor who has good reviews on Yelp or some other rating site, and test him out first with a pair of business casual slacks. If he does the slacks well and does them the way you've instructed him to, then you've most likely got a guy who can deal with your suit. Bonus points if the guy actually does custom suiting, shirting, etc. and makes his own garments and seems to possess some sense of style himself. With this tailor, have him "suppress the waist" as it's called--to take the suit in a bit in the midsection so that a nice silhouette of your body shape shows. A well-fitting suit should have a slight V-shape to it that accentuates the shape of your body. Like Will Arnett seems to know. No straight down lines--there's no character in that and you end up looking boxy. As a rule of thumb, when buttoned, you should not be able to sit down comfortably in the suit. At your events, you'll be unbuttoning to sit down anyway, but following this rule means you'll have a nice fit when you are standing up, suit buttoned, drink in hand.

Finally, if you want a bit more of a modern look, have the sleeves and jacket shortened just a hair. On sleeves, you should be showing 1/4 to 1/2 inch of shirt cuff underneath when standing. More than 1/2 inch is a bit loud, but seems to be trendy now. Similarly, taking the jacket length up from top-of-palm to mid-palm or even base-of-thumb seems to be in right now. These are not exactly timeless alterations (read: don't do these trendy things to your classic Canali or Purple Label suit), but seem to be "in" right now. Some of these teeny-bopper types seem to have sleeves that are longer than their jackets. I'm not a fan, but hey, I guess some people find it quite becoming.

Get one suit, stick to these basics, and then fancy it up with a good shirt and a great tie, and the women will say "My my, he cleans up nice."

Part and parcel to this is 3a. Know How to Dress--wear shirts that fit, wear pants that fit, have your own sense of style, but also understand some basics like "don't wear jean shorts" and "wear things other than plain black t-shirts with cargo shorts all the time," Anant. Wear a casual blazer when appropriate. Invest in a great pair of black shoes, a great pair of brown shoes, and a casual pair of loafers. Those types of things.

TheRanga's score: TBD. Getting there, I hope.

4. "Own" One Sport or Team

There are certain guys that I don't like talking to because they are just flat-out tough to talk to. If that happens, I always rely on my fallback: sports. In some cases, that makes the aforementioned guy a bit more pleasant to talk to; in other cases, the guy will have no discernible interest in sports, and I begin questioning his manhood and usually give up on talking to the idiot.

Clearly, TheWife gives no credence to this item on the list, but this one is important to TheRanga. I love sports. I love watching sports, I love playing sports, I love talking about sports, I love reading about sports. Most of the guys I know have similar feelings. I think, with every man I know, I can associate at least one sport or sports team with him. And if I can't, then he and I probably aren't great friends. Man-love for sports leads to spirited conversations, passionate debates, hilarious email strings, a fall full of fantasy football fun, more fun when hanging out and of course, a mutual understanding of "You like at least one sport. Ergo, you are a man." Enough said.

TheRanga's score: Pass. An unnecessarily high passing grade, if you ask TheWife.

5. Cook

Yeah, I said it. There's a certain self-sufficiency about a man who knows how to cook, and any woman will tell you she loves a man who knows how to cook. For a romantic night with the lady, it's an unequivocal winner. Even if you burn the shit out of everything, rest assured she'll be thinking "at least he tried" while you both chow down on Papa John's.

Get the basics down. Breakfast is an easy department and one owned by most men-of-the-house, including Dad. Eggs, bacon, biscuits and gravy, some homemade hash browns, perhaps some pancakes, who knows. Even dinners can be easy--as Anant says, "master one concept, and all the adjacent recipes will follow." For instance, with Anant's help, last night I infused hot olive oil with some garlic and red chili flakes, then sauteed some chard and mixed nuts in the oil. The concept is now there--infuse oil, add greens, add crunch. Next time? Maybe some wilted spinach and sunflower seeds? Who knows! Flavor, heat, nutrients--can't be beat! Bonus points for being able to grill a good steak, and of course knowing how to make ethnic foods, especially Indian and Thai, which can be pretty complex.

TheRanga's score: Low Pass, but getting higher.

Wow, I'm like half a man, according to myself. Coming next with TheWife's installment of her five things every man should be able to do.

Back at it!

Well, I'm finally home after a two-week travel stint: one week in India for work and then another in Georgia to see ParentsOfTheWife. All was good. Luckily, missed getting rained on in Bombay, as apparently the monsoon was a few days delayed. However, we got monsoons and more in Georgia, where it rained 4 of the 6 days we were there.

For now, it's back at the house, cleaning up the disaster zone that this place has become after nearly a month of neglect. Yesterday, I spent about three hours cleaning up the kitchen, washing pots and pans, and wiping down the counters. Today, I think I'll tackle the family room and bedroom. If I can convince TheWife to unpack any of her myriad suitcases from recent trips, I think we might actually make progress! Problem is, TheWife still hasn't unpacked all her shit since we moved here two years ago, so color me doubtful. And any iota of free time that her job lends her is spent going to outlet malls, visiting cousins, visiting friends, watching Criminal Minds, watching Cold Case, watching Law & Order: SVU, painting her toe nails, painting her finger nails, baking cupcakes, reading Wikipedia, curling her hair, straightening her hair, watching The Voice, watching Duets, etc etc etc. Somewhere, waaaaay down on the list, you will find "cleaning." But I've never seen her get that far down the list.

The one bright spot is that Bocephus and Anant took good care of the lawn while I was gone, so the house is looking quite nice on the outside. It's always nice to come home to grass that isn't knee-high, but is in fact freshly cut! Anyway, I'm weird, and these are apparently the things that I care about. Moving on.

I've been continuing the assault, and am quite hopeful and confident that I have settled into a nice, sustainable routine of eating healthy, working out regularly, and occasionally cheating. TheWife is continually pissed at me for not wanting to eat the fat-laden pastas she's always interested in, but I'm not budging, dammit! Sure, I'll let myself have a slice or two of pizza every now and then, but none of this every night nonsense. That's what got me to 203 in the first place! I've been pretty good about sticking to lean meats, vegetables, fruits and nuts and I think the results are showing.

Bocephus, Anant (to the extent that a vegetarian can), and I have all adopted a sort of "Paleo" diet recently. The basic tenets of the Paleo diet are that we should concentrate on eating naturally occurring foods that our Paleolithic ancestors ate for hundreds of thousands of years and evolved our bodies to digest most easily. Now, lest I sound crazy, I will assure you, basically, it just means cutting out a lot of the refined grains like breads, tortillas, pastas, etc., and also paring back on dairy products and just focusing on eating, as I said above, lean meats, veggies, fruits and nuts. Basically, just eating healthy. I'm trying to stick as closely to it as possible, but clearly there are weekends with friends, the occasional trip to a restaurant, etc., where the rules will have to be relaxed a bit. And that's fine by me.

The other side of the assaulting equation, exercise, has been going well too. Was able to get in five mini-crossfit workouts in my 7 days in India, and got in 6 while in Georgia. Back in CT since Sunday night, and I'm glad to say I worked out Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday. I'm starting to get much better definition around the arms, legs and shoulders and the weight is still slowly melting off. When I started the assault back in December, I weighed 192 and stated a goal of 180. I hit 180 fairly recently and reset the goal to 175-170. Today, I'm at 177. So I'm headed in the right direction!

Current weight: 177.0
Target weight: 170.0
Time frame: Open-ended. Let's call it 8 weeks.

Jai Hind!

So, I'm back in India again for the next week, hosting some clients who are in town. Got in late last night and am spending a nice leisurely weekend fighting the jetlag, taking in Bombay and of course, sari shopping for TheWife. The journey over wasn't too bad--a 7-hour flight, a 2-hour layover, and an 8-hour flight were made MUCH easier by two upgrades to business elite. Instead of cramming myself into the sardine box that is coach, I got to actually lie down, with a real-life pillow (not one of those gauze-wrapped turds in coach) and an appropriately sized blanket. Needless to say, I was nice and fresh upon arriving in India.

The other upshot of business elite is, of course, the food. Whereas in coach, they're throwing some sweet potato burrito or crappy four-cheese pizza at me every three hours, up front, it's nicer than any meal I'd be ordering at a restaurant, and that's not a lie. I can't remember when I've ever ordered warm mixed nuts, tomato basil soup, mixed green salad with walnuts and cranberries, braised short ribs in a red wine reduction with parsnip puree and sauteed carrots, all topped off with a fruit and cheese plate for dessert. Maybe I'm getting too excited about airplane food, but I thought it was REALLY good. I should also remind you that my favorite restaurant of all time is Chili's. So do with my words what you will.

I had the distinct pleasure of sitting next to some old Indian guy on the flight from Amsterdam to Bombay. The guy spoke very little English but didn't let that stop him from talking to me the entire flight in some bastardized form of Hinglish. He may as well have had no dentures in, because I had no clue what the F he was saying the entire time. Even after I told him in no uncertain terms that I don't speak Hindi, he kept asking me questions in Hindi and waiting for my response. After struggling through conversation about where I am from and what I do and where I grew up, he then asked me this question: "Where you bore?"

"I'm sorry?"

"Where you bore? New York?"

"Was I born in New York?"

"Yes. New York. You bore New York?"

"Yes."

"Mumble mumble aap ka mere tum bin kabhi kabhi hindi hindi bore."

"I'm sorry?"

"Morning? Night? When you bore?"

Now, to all of my non-Indian readers, you should understand this: Indians have a weird thing with astrology and are generally interested in stupid shit like "What time of the day were you born?" or "What is the best time of the day to get married?" and so on. It is the reason all Indians request bio-data from other families when a boy and a girl have met (or are to meet) and is also the exact reason I had to wake up at 4:45am on my wedding day to get married in a private ceremony before the large festivities began. Certain times of certain days are auspicious for various reasons, and we'll leave it at that. So as an Indian speaking to another Indian, it wasn't ENTIRELY weird that this guy was asking what time I was born. Maybe he has a daughter or granddaughter that he thinks is worthy of my attention--who knows. Whatever, I kept indulging this inane, worthless conversation.

"I was born in 1982. April 14."

"New York bore?"

"Yes, in New York."

"What time?"

"I have no idea. Morning I guess, but I really don't know. Sorry."

"You no know bore time? You get on plane? What time you bore? Morning long time night bore apka hum."

Really not knowing what the hell the plane has to do with what time I was born, I use my go-to:

"I'm sorry?"

"Plane Plane! Bore! New York! Bore! Time!!!"

If you're smarter than I am, hats off to you, but I only figured it out at this point. This guy has been asking me what time my flight BOARDED in New York, and I told him April 14, 1982. He must have been as confused as I was. For all I know, this guy is blogging away in Pune right now about the idiot American he tried talking to on the flight last night. And that, friends, is a long way of saying I need to learn Hindi!

The Weekly Platter

So, it's Friday, May 18. I haven't posted in a while, so I'm serving you my buffet of blog posts here. The Weekly Platter, if you will.

Personal

The Assault is continuing on after a small break due to a lingering back issue. I think I may have slipped a disc in my back when sleeping awkwardly on Ro's couch about a month ago. But a couple of weeks of sleeping on the floor and taking a break from the gym have me feeling about 95% now. Got in three Crossfit sessions this past week and am looking forward to continuing with the strength and conditioning regimen there. Every day, it's something different. And every day, I wake up sore all over. I look forward to each workout and am truly exhausted when each workout is done. It's a win-win, folks! Yesterday's workout: 21-15-9 of box jumps and burpees (that means 21 box jumps, 21 burpees, 15 box jumps, 15 burpees, 9 box jumps, 9 burpees). Took me 7:30 with sporadic 5-10 second rests between sets. Not thrilled with my time, but my lungs still hurt this morning, so I'm pushing myself.

Weight is still right around 181. I'll admit, I haven't really been making an effort to get down to the 175 target I laid out some months back. I've been content to sit right around here, and this week, MotherOfTheWife is in town and making all sorts of Indian foods that I can't possibly say no to, so who knows how much I've been eating. But no more! The honeymoon with 180 is over. Time to bust through the plateau and reach 175. I got weddings to go to this summer, dammit!

Travel

Just got done with a stint in Florida, Atlanta, Nashville, New York and Chicago. A couple of weeks here on the homefront in CT, and then it's out to India for a week. I'll return to CT for one night to attend TheWife's residency program graduation dinner (she's not graduating, she's got another year), and then it's off to Georgia for a week. One June wedding in L.A., one July wedding in Seattle, an August wedding in Asheville, NC, and a September wedding in Long Island will cap off the personal summer travel. As for work, who knows.

TheWife


Many of you who know me know that my month-long trip all around the US and to the Caribbean, followed by the two-week work trip mentioned above, left TheWife feeling abandoned. It didn't help that Anant decided to peace out for most of that time, too, so TheWife was in effect at home by herself for the majority of the time. And yes, she blamed me for this. In fact, she so hated me that she wouldn't even speak to me or let me finish a sentence on the few days I was at home. I told her it felt like we had broken up, but we were still living together. It was super odd. Anyway, she had no idea I was going to Chicago because when I tried apprising her of my travel plans, she cut me off with a curt "I don't care" or simply didn't listen when I did tell her my plans. So imagine her rage when she called me on her way home from work one day, just to hear me tell her I'm on the way to Chicago. Hell has no wrath like TheWife scorned.

Well, I'm glad to say TheRanga, not unlike ThePhoenix, has risen from the flames a stronger and more powerful being. And how did I do it? I'm actually not sure. I think it's some combination of actually being at home for an extended period of time and delivering her a great birthday gift along with a reservation at a nifty little restaurant, capped off by an extravaganza of cupcakes from the best bakery in Hartford. Apparently, the best way to TheWife's heart is through her sweet tooth. Boom, baby!

(TheWife, if you are reading this, I love you very much)

Sports


I won't go too much into detail here, but the Saints bounty-gate scandal keeps getting more and more complicated. Anthony Hargrove's recent admission that Joe Vitt and Gregg Williams told him to lie is a HUGE stain on the franchise that has been denying any wrongdoing so far. Somehow, this seems to have passed without much more scrutiny. The suspensions, while severe, were in this Saints fan's opinion, warranted. Otherwise, how the hell is the NFL going to put a stop to this kind of behavior?

But NOW, things have taken an even more interesting turn, with Jonathan Vilma deciding to sue Roger Goodell for defamation of character. Vilma must be completely resolute in his protests that he never paid, nor intended to pay, any player for intentionally inflicting injury upon another player. I just don't even know  what to think at this point. As a lifelong Saints fan, when we won SB XLIV, it felt too good to be true. It now seems that maybe it was too good, even if only a little bit.

As for Duke basketball, an offseason that was only slightly better than the Saints' took a turn for the better this week, when the Blue Devils landed a top 25 recruit, power forward Amile Jefferson. Finally, Duke gets the long, versatile, mismatch guy that we have sorely missed since the likes of Shane Battier and Mike Dunleavy. At 6'7", 190, Jefferson has a bit of filling out to do, but I have faith in the Duke staff to use him in a way that makes the team a bit less one-dimensional than last year's squad. So we'll return Seth Curry, Andre Dawkins (maybe), Tyler Thornton and Quin Cook in the backcourt; Mason Plumlee, Ryan Kelly, Josh Hairston, Alex Murphy and Marshall Plumlee (God, please let this one be better than the last two) down low; and we'll be adding sharpshooter Rasheed Sulaimon and the aforementioned Amile Jefferson to the squad. If Murphy and the younger Plumlee can come in without missing a beat (remember, they red-shirted last year, so they should be familiar with all the sets) and if Sulaimon and Jefferson can adapt quickly this summer, we might actually field a decent team! Honestly, as long as we don't lose to another 15-seed in the first round, I'll be happy.

So, I Actually Read an Article

I read this article last week in the WSJ. For those of you who can't access it because WSJ requires a subscription, I'll give you the skinny: basically, a body of scientists who carry out studies and influence national health policy have come out and said that obesity is at an all-time high and it's high time we do something about it. That's all fine and good--I agree wholeheartedly. The article then goes on to elaborate on what the scientists say we should do in order to fight obesity: place an emphasis on daily exercise and also implement systems for counseling, preventing, and treating obesity. Again, this is all fine and good. Overall, however, the article has a tone of "Why do we have so much trouble legislating obesity out of our society?" In fact, a telling excerpt from the article states the following:

"While several cities and states have considered excise taxes on sugared drinks in recent years, for example, the beverage industry has spent millions of dollars lobbying and advertising against them. All have eventually been defeated thus far."

And this is where my problem lies. I don't know that we should rely on laws to fight obesity. There is a camp that will argue that food, like alcohol or tobacco, is an addictive substance and that an addiction to food can lead to self-destructive behavior: eating disorders, depression, isolation, deeper psychological problems, suicide; you name it, you could probably find a way to link food to it. These people will argue that if alcohol and tobacco are so heavily regulated at the federal and state levels, then why not food? And this is a sound logical argument.

Except for one crucial fact--food is a necessity for life; alcohol and tobacco are not. I think it's pretty universally accepted that being a drinker of alcohol or a user of tobacco shortens your life; it cannot be argued that being an eater of food shortens your life. Yes, being an eater of certain foods will clearly shorten your life, but being an employee of certain companies will shorten your life too--any job involving exposure to the elements, manual labor, inhalation of pollution or an undue amount of stress will take some days, if not years, off your life.

In the work world, we call this "occupational hazard" and go about our merry way, saying "well, that guy CHOSE to be a coal miner/painter/construction worker/investment banker/biohazard cleanup guy, so it's his fault." But when someone eats fried chicken, pizza and wings to his death, now we're getting up in arms about the government's responsibility to tell that guy not to eat so much pizza? Or, alternatively, we look to the government to make pizza so expensive that he no longer finds utility in eating it. In my opinion, this guy made the choice to overeat pizza and is paying the price.

Now, lest I sound insensitive, a disclaimer: those of you who know me know that I am a passionate eater. If I could, I would eat pizza, fried chicken, and tacos every day for the rest of my life. Many of you have seen me take down an entire pizza or 10+ tacos at a time, in fact. Hell, I really like the way beer tastes and I wouldn't mind having a bunch of beer every day for the rest of my life. But this is 2012--I have the internet and a wealth of other resources at my disposal. I know that eating a ton of pizza and drinking a ton of beer on a daily basis will dig me an early grave. Thus, I don't do it. I don't need a law to make pizza more expensive to keep me from eating it. I just need the information that pizza, while delicious, is not good for me and should not be eaten on a daily basis. And this is where this article fails, because it doesn't mention the most potent weapon we have in the fight against obesity: early childhood parenting.

It is no secret that childhood obesity has reached alarming levels these days, and the nation is wondering what the hell we are to do about it. But the funny thing is this: obesity is at such a high level in 2012, when we arguably have MUCH more information on healthy foods/lifestyles, much more access to healthy foods, and a wealth of options for children in terms of exercise. For instance, when I grew up in Louisiana in the '80s, I guarantee there was little information on trans fats, optimal grain/meat/dairy intake per day; there sure as hell were no healthy options at McDonald's; and finding a tennis partner in north Louisiana, well, I may as well have been looking for a cricket partner.

The key that kept me from being a gigantic fatass as a kid was simply that Mom would yell at us for watching too much TV and playing too much Nintendo or generally just sitting around too much. We had to do chores around the house--one of us loaded the dishwasher after dinner, one of us cleared the dining table, the other cleaned the countertops and stovetops. On the weekends, we were forced to help Mom and Dad in the garden planting pansies, dethatching the grass, turning over the flowerbeds--whatever needed to be done that day, basically. Each evening, we had to pick up our mess in our bedrooms and go to bed in a clean room. Even when there weren't chores to be done, Mom would give us an allotted time for TV (usually 1-2 episodes of Saved By the Bell and California Dreamin'), and then would literally turn the TV off and say "go run around outside."

Now, we weren't eating the healthiest foods on earth--after all, most of our meals were Indian food, which is really not that great for you; and the "eat out" nights were always pizza, Taco Bell, or Chinese food--but what we were doing was moving around. A lot. Was I as good at Tecmo Bowl as some of my friends? Well, no. Was I skinnier than they were? No question. And there is no doubt in my mind that those habits cultivated in me by my parents have always laid the foundation for me to live an active lifestyle. As you can tell from reading the Assault posts, I'm not eating raw veggies all day long every day. I enjoy my trips to the pizzeria, Popeye's, and my boy Chili's, but there is always an emphasis on activity. Even if it's not intense exercise at the Crossfit gym, it's cleaning out the garage, picking up in the bedroom, decluttering the kitchen and breakfast area, trying to walk a lot during the day by parking farther away from the office, grocery store, etc. These little habits, when repeated every day, make a world of difference. And in my opinion, these habits start at an early age. Sadly, not enough parents are instilling these habits in their children.

So while the WSJ can point to the lack of codified nutrition legislation and Coca-Cola's lobbying budget as prime culprits in the fattening of America, I'm looking at the irresponsible parents who, when faced with the decision of what to feed their kids for dinner, stuff them with Coke and pizza and then let them sit and watch TV and play Xbox all night. Write an article on what we're going to do about that, WSJ, and I'll pay more attention. Hopefully then, we can start pushing these bars lower:

Travel Hiatus

Alrighty, I'm back, if only for a few days. After the nearly month-long trip out to Atlanta, Louisiana, Arizona, Los Angeles, Las Vegas, New Jersey, and the Dominican Republic, I'm back at the house, recharging for some more upcoming travel. This Friday, it's down to Florida to celebrate Mom and Dad's anniversary, then back to CT for a day, then off to Atlanta, Nashville, New York, and Chicago for more work travel. The flying never stops!

Had a great trip out west--attended an awesome wedding in beautiful Scottsdale, AZ, a place that definitely is creeping up the list of golf destinations to visit one day. Had a good visit with Ro and JayMoney in Los Angeles, then a stealthy celebration of The Face's bachelorhood in Vegas. Spent the 30th bday on a plane back to the east coast, but it's ok, because the crew in DR wholly embraced the belated bday concept. Plenty of nachos were eaten and beers consumed to commemorate the aging of TheRanga. The trip did end on a sour note though, with the hotel maid stealing $180 in cash from our hotel room the last day of the trip. Very unfortunate.

On a side note, the DR has one of the better "island" beers I've tried. Not that I've tried many, but of Hinano in Tahiti, Balashi in Aruba, Red Stripe in Jamaica, and Island Hoppin' IPA of St. John/St. Thomas, DR's Presidente probably ranks as my second favorite (behind Red Stripe). It's a little heavier and a bit more bitter, but quite drinkable with dinner, which any good beer should be. True to my form, I purchased the local beer shirt while there. Let's hope this one actually fits!

Assault-wise, came through the month-long trip relatively unscathed. 182 today, and I'm starting my Crossfit regimen tomorrow afternoon. Was good about getting in workouts in Georgia, walked a lot of golf holes and ran a couple times in Louisiana, hit the gym in Arizona and Los Angeles regularly, and in DR, remained active with lots of baseball (not baseball, but "BAH-zee-ball," a gentleman's game that deftly mixes basketball, volleyball, and chess into a well-orchestrated, graceful symphony. WTF, you ask? More on that later), swimming, walking, etc. Now back home, I can rein in the eating and ramp up the activity. 175, here I come!

The Assault Continues

In keeping with the whole "accountability" thing, I'm overdue for an assault post here. Here's what the last week looked like.

March 27 - Travel to Georgia, off day
March 28 - Back, biceps, shoulders, 10 minute elliptical (hip flexor was tight, so skipped the run)
March 29 - One hour of racquetball with the father-in-law (who thundered me the entire hour, very embarrassing); 10 minute run (1.25 miles)
March 30 - Off day
March 31 - Chest, triceps, forearms, abs, 50 med-ball wall shots (basically a squat that ends with throwing a med ball to a spot 9 feet high on the wall--good for glutes, hammys, quads, chest, triceps)
April 1 - 50 minutes of racquetball, this time with Anant, who also sucks at racquetball. Not a great workout.
April 2 - walked 8 holes of golf, maybe 2 miles. Again, not a great workout.
April 3 - plan is to walk 18 holes today, perhaps 5 miles. Depending on energy levels, maybe a short run at home afterwards.

Weigh-ins are a bit apples-to-oranges, as I'm weighing in on different scales while on the road. In Georgia, weighed in at 178, but that's an old scale that may read a bit light. Here in Louisiana, weighed in at 182 last night, and that's probably accurate. I'll keep the eating reasonable today and hopefully be back on track.

Current weight: 182
Target weight: 175
Time frame: 5 weeks