Wednesday, September 21, 2011

What I've Been Watching (And Liking) Recently

Here's a list of stuff (mostly recent) that I've watched once or many times over the last year or two and liked. Maybe you've seen them, maybe you haven't, but here's my take. I won't give too much away in case you haven't seen it, but I will tell you why I liked it.

Black Swan - Even if this movie had sucked, I would have loved it because Natalie Portman and Mila Kunis are beautiful and I can stare at them all day. Add in the fact that this is a deeply complex movie with some seriously dark themes that are beautifully imagined on the screen, and top it off with a unique performance from Natalie Portman (you would think she's a ballerina, not an actress), and I'm not sure why this didn't win Best Picture. The music, the dancing, the story, the performance--a ridiculously well-crafted movie that leaves you thinking for a long while afterwards about the struggle of performance.

Also, there's a lesbian scene between the aforementioned ladies. So, yeah.

Toy Story 3 - Many call this the best of the Toy Story trilogy, and for good reason. For my money, the original is still my sentimental favorite, but Pixar really tied everything up expertly and did it in quite an emotional way in TS3. I'm not afraid to admit that the climax of the movie had me legitimately tearing up. But what a great way to wrap up a storyline and cast of characters that revolutionized the animated film landscape for the last 15 years, and likely much longer after this.

Bridesmaids - This movie has a strong argument for the best movie of 2011 thus far, not to mention the best comedy. I'm not one for chick flicks or femme-coms, and this movie breaks the mold. Kristen Wiig proves herself far too talented to be stuck on SNL every week--she is a joy to watch and effortlessly captures a tough character, reminding us all of someone in our circle of friends, our family, or maybe even our own selves, when we haven't been at our best. This movie is not "Hangover for Girls" as advertised: this movie has plot, character, and heart. It's a realistic, gritty, fun, and in many ways uncomfortable look at the pleasures and pains of getting older and moving on in our lives.

Kick Ass - I'll admit it--the premise looked shaky. Why do I want to watch a superhero movie about people who aren't superheroes? This movie of course has its flaws, but is laudable in its realistic take on superhero stories. The movie has the feel of a summer superhero movie, with strong comic relief, interesting characters working through their individual struggles and an easily hateable villain. But let's be clear--you want this movie for the action scenes. There is one scene in this movie--those who have seen it know what I'm talking about--that has to be in consideration for the best action scene ever captured on film. The combination of cinematography, choreography, accompanying score and gravity of the plot when the scene takes place is, simply put, transcendental. Better than any action scene I have ever witnessed. You have to see this movie, if only for that scene.

Crazy Stupid Love - Recently, TheWife and I were bemoaning the fact that no decent romantic comedy had been made since Love Actually. While we seemed to get strong rom-coms throughout the 90s with all the Tom Hanks, Meg Ryan, Hugh Grant, and Julia Roberts pics, we've been noticeably bankrupt of any good romantic comedies for years. TheWife thought that Larry Crowne would be her answer. Well, even she thought it was bad, and she only cares to watch movies that rate below 40% on RottenTomatoes.com. However, we heard this one was good, so gave it a shot. Somewhat surprisingly, this is a refreshing, fun, and relatable story that gets you into the characters and has you rooting for everyone. Steve Carrell is his usual great self, and Ryan Gosling is quite great as well. While it doesn't rate anywhere in my top movies list, it is the best of its genre in quite some time.

Friday Night Lights (TV) - TheWife has christened this "The Best Drama on TV. Ever." While I'm not yet willing to go that far, this series is certainly in the discussion. Completely unlike the movie, FNL is purely character-based, with West Texas football madness a constant and palpable undercurrent throughout each season. There isn't an overdose of football, so the ladies can stomach it. There isn't an overdose of cheese, so the guys like it. And the characters are perhaps the most interesting group of characters assembled on a show in some time. Whether going through high school with the players, at home or on the field with the coach, or following the grads after they've left Dillon high, the show creates a dynamic interplay between the characters' priorities in life and their love for West Texas football, and how sometimes, the two become hopelessly intertwined and force both good decisions and bad on everyone's part.

The Wire (TV) - Everyone but TheWife has called this the best drama on TV, and it's hard to argue. While some of the seasons get away from the most central and interesting characters, largely, the series stays on point as it addresses the issues of race, corruption, politics, and the drug trade in Western Baltimore, and how every person involved, from the drug lords to the cops to the mayor, deal with tackling the issues. While slow to start and at times slow to develop, HBO has uniquely developed a set of characters whom we feel so close to, we know what they should do, but what they will do, and why they will do it. In addition, the series brings a realistic look to crime-fighting that most crime shows don't--how gridlock, red tape and a system devoid of accountability can tangibly impact what happens on our streets, usually for the worst.

Rescue Me (TV) - A salty, testosterone-filled (that sounds super gross) look at the lives of firemen on FDNY Truck 62 in the wake of 9/11. The central character, played by Denis Leary, is a textbook hero with monumental struggle, but with seriously unorthodox ways--for better and for worse--of envisioning his own struggle and attacking it. Not only does the show cleverly capture the camaraderie and ethical code between brothers on the same truck, but also deftly depicts how the life of a fireman translates to the home. This show is one of the main reasons to pay attention to all the other shows FX puts out.

Frasier (TV) - Ending on a lighter note here, Frasier has to be my favorite sitcom of all time. From Frasier's arrival in Seattle and his initially coarse relationship with his own father Martin, to Niles' struggles with his own marriage and his latent feelings for Daphne, to Frasier's never-ending quest to find "the one" and Roz's undying attempts to land just one, this show is filled with acerbic wit, humorous drama, and a cast of five characters who can't be more different but are constantly there for one another, whether or not they want to be. It's hard to imagine a show being better written than Frasier. Modern Family comes close, and for good reason--Christopher Lloyd, who writes and produces for Modern Family, did the same for Frasier! Gonna have to find more of his stuff.

Fantasy Thoughts, Week 2

My not-so-quick thoughts after Week 2:

- F you, Miami Dolphins. All preseason, I hear that you will feature Reggie Bush as your RB this year. As a long-time Reggie fan, I remain skeptical at the likelihood of this plan materializing. Week 1, you stay true to your word and feature Reggie Bush as your RB, giving him 20 touches and likely another 5-7 targets above that. He gets 95 total yards and a TD. Very respectable for a flex spot. So, I put my trust in you in Week 2, and you F me in the A! Why!?!?!

- The Pats look good, but whoa Pats secondary! For the second week in a row, you got torched! In Week 1, all-time Dolphin great Chad Henne goes for 416. In Week 2, all-time Douchebag great Phillip Rivers goes for 378. Granted, this may be a self-fulfilling prophecy: the Pats get a big lead in a hurry, and the opposing QB is left to throw all game, resulting in a lot of yards, many incompletions, and a few picks. But still--can the Pats afford to give away 400 yards a game in the air? I guess they can--so far. Note to self: start #1 WRs against the Pats' D. Might Ryan Fitzpatrick be a good starting QB against the Pats?

- Cam Newton did it again? He's on pace to eclipse 6,500 yards in the air and also rush for 500. Rookie of the year, anyone? Lotta picks, though. Charles Woodson had a field day with Newton on Sunday. Although I picked him up in my league, I am still skeptical. That team has been too one-dimensional thus far, and is 0-2 to show for it. The Panthers will need to start running the ball to win games--Newton's numbers will drop bigtime, and the Panthers should start winning games. Problem is, as long as the Panthers' D is so banged up, it's hard to see the Panthers not getting down early and often and having to throw deep to catch up. Also, the Jags give up a lot of yards through the air. Could he go off again?

- Miles Austin owners, you had a good two weeks. Good luck now. After two stellar weeks racking up 233 yards and 4 TD, Austin's hammy will keep him out until October 16th. Is anyone going to pick up Jesse Holley on this news? Not sure. Hopefully the excess throws will go to Jason Witten. With Romo banged up, Austin out, and the imbalance between the run and pass so huge, look for the Boys to start going to the ground and for short, check-down and dump-off passes more.

- If Big Ben can only put up a 15-point fantasy week against the Seahawks, what can we expect from him the rest of the year? Well, luckily, I think more. The Steelers still have (get this) the Colts, Jags, Cardinals, Browns twice, Bengals twice, Chiefs, Rams, and Niners on the schedule. Are you kidding me???? They even go against the Pats, who apparently like to get thrown on, and the Titans, who I can't imagine are that good. Big Ben, you better perform. Your owners want more yards and TDs out of you. Less rapes.

- Michael Turner is averaging 6.9 yards per carry this year. Matty Ice, stop throwing aimlessly to Julio Jones and give fatty the rock!

- Tony Gonzalez had a monster game against the Eagles (83 yards and 2 TD) and I think he provided the blueprint on how to attack the Eagles offensively. No team is going to have much success on the edges with Asante Samuel and Nnamdi Asomugha locking things down and DRC providing nickel coverage. Evidence: Roddy White 23 yards, Julio Jones 29 yards, Harry Douglas 19 yards. However, teams will be able to attack the linebacker corps of the Eagles, and also should have success undercutting the aggressive "wide 9" pass-rush technique with up-the-gut runs and well-timed screens. Between-the-tackles runners, tight ends and utility backs against the Eagles should be good plays throughout the year. At least until the Eagles O-line-coach-turned-Defensive-Coordinator figures out what's going on.

- Anyone who was supremely bored on Monday night and watched the Rams-Giants games knows this: Josh Brown is a good pickup at kicker. The Rams are a perfect fantasy kicker team. Strong-armed quarterback who can deliver the ball downfield with accuracy and relative ease, but enough question marks on offense to be predictable and thus dreadful in the red zone. Josh Brown got you 3 FGs and an XP on Monday. In Week 1, two FGs and an XP. And the guy's got a big leg. Should be good for a solid 7-12 points a week at the kicker spot.

- If you have a defense who likes to blitz, definitely start them when they play the Bears. The Bears-Saints game did not prove to me that the Saints still have a good defense. It proved to me that the Bears have an absolutely deplorable offensive line. On the 6 sacks Cutler took, I'd like to know the average elapsed time from snap to sack--couldn't have been more than 2 seconds. These were not coverage sacks. Every one was a blown assignment or a blitz that went unaddressed. Side note: few things make me happier than to see Jay Cutler in misery.

My quick thoughts on Week 2:

- Kenny Britt is a beast and a must-start as long as Hasselbeck continues to have this career-reviving year.
- Drew Brees hasn't thrown a pick yet, but look for that to change. Too many close calls so far. Quietly, Brees has the second-most completions of 70+ yards since the merger with 12 (first place, Favre, of course).
- Purely fantasy-wise, the Saints are a waste for your RB spots. Too much splitting between the three guys. Look to Sproles to get the red-zone TDs, as the Saints love the screen play in that part of the field.
- Matt Stafford, seriously? The guy is legitimately good! Watch him look off the safety on his long TD pass to Scheffler on Sunday. Let's see if he can pick apart Green Bay's D.
- Eli Manning is simply not that good. Even when he sets his feet and gets a throw off, he doesn't inspire confidence. And his receivers (except Nicks) are shaky at best. And now Hixon is out with an ACL. Ouch.
- The Texans are best in the league against the pass going into the Superdome this week. Something's gotta give.

The Bug

Is officially making its rounds. I thought I would be immune because of my general awesomeness and immunity-boosting instincts, but boy was I wrong. Jumped on a train to NYC on Saturday evening for a fun time with friends and family, and woke up Sunday morning with a scratchy throat. Monday, the throat was on fire. Tuesday, not so much throat, but coughing, sneezing, and congestion. Last night, trouble breathing through the nose and thus cottonmouth every 20 minutes and 4.5 hours of severely interrupted sleep. Today, thanks to Veramyst, the right nostril is flowing freely, but left nostril is doomed. Makes me yearn for the days that I breathe freely and think nothing of it. The things we take for granted!

Quick note about the Veramyst I've been pumping through my nose all morning. Back in spring, Ach invited some of us over to his place for New York strip steaks, Islay scotch, and Texas Hold 'Em poker. I partook in all of the above, and right vigorously. After cleaning house in poker at 3am, I wound down for the night on Ach's couch. Ever the responsible drunk, I managed to set my iPhone alarm for 7:45am, so I could make my 8:15 doctor's appointment. Mid-check up, the doctor noted my raspy voice, bloodshot eyes, and general grogginess. Curious, he asked me, "What's wrong with you?" Ever the quick-thinking drunk, I responded, "Allergies. I spent the night at a friend's house last night, and he has a cat. Also, it's early spring, so the pollen is killing me. And it's 8am right now, when the pollen count is highest. So...you know." And BOOM! Three bottles of Veramyst free samples later, I was outta there!

Good thing he didn't take my blood that day. It would have been thin, and likely peaty.

Thursday, September 15, 2011

What a Week 1!

So, I just thought about it, and this has to go down as one of the greatest Week 1's in NFL history, just based on big plays. In just the first week of the season, we already have:

- The longest kickoff return in history (Randall Cobb, 108 yds)
- The longest FG in history (Sebastian Janikowski, 63 yds)
- The longest pass play in history (Tom Brady to Wes Welker, 99 yds)
- The most passing yards by a rookie QB in his debut (Cam Newton, 422 yds)

In addition, we had a titanic matchup between the Saints and Packers that went down to the last snap, a miraculous comeback by the Jets in front of an emotional crowd on the 10th anniversary of 9/11, and the effing Buffalo Bills hanging 41 points on last year's AFC West champions! What the hell is going on?

I love the NFL!

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Striking Fantasy Gold, Sort Of

Yesterday, I woke up to see that in one of my fantasy football leagues, I was down 124-60. My opponent still had Rob Gronkowski and Sebastian Janikowski going in the MNF games, while I had Tom Brady, Wes Welker, Brandon Lloyd, and Dan Carpenter going for me. I needed my four guys to outscore his two guys by 64 points or more.

The way I saw it, Carpenter and Janikowski would cancel out, while Gronkowski and Lloyd would cancel out. So it was up to Brady and Welker to get me 64 or more points. A tall task for sure, but I'll be damned if they didn't give me 69 points! The highlight of those 69 points was the garbage time, 99-yard Brady to Welker TD pass. On that one play, I netted 9 points from Brady (4 for the yards and 5 for the TD) and 16 from Welker (10 for the yards and 6 for the TD), for a 25-point play. I discussed it with my brother, and I don't believe there is any play in football that can net a fantasy player more points than a 99-yard TD pass when you have both the QB and the receiver. Please correct me if I'm wrong.

So after the Pats-Fins game, I'm looking pretty good--Brady/Welker got me 69, while Gronk gave my opponent 16. So I made up 53 points of the 64-point deficit. Now, I just needed Brandon Lloyd to outscore Janikowski by 11. Again, not easy to do, but Lloyd was such a huge target for Orton all year, I thought at least he'd get 70-100 yds and a TD. What I did not expect was for that motherf*cker Janikowski to tie an NFL record 63-yd FG along with two other FGs, while Orton fumbled and threw the ball away all night. Totally hosed!

If you had told me that my four MNF players would net me 84 points, I would have been ecstatic. I put up 144 points and still lost. I got the best fantasy play possible, but all for naught. Sorry the picture's small--click through to see the original size.

Update: I've decided that there IS a play better than the one mentioned above. The same play, but with the addition of being "short" the opposing defense, ie, your opponent having the opposing defense. In my case, the Welker TD put the Pats above 35 points, which puts the Miami D in negative territory for points (and in more negative territory for yards, if the league is one that docks for yards given up).




Just $2,000?

Ok, so anyone who watched the US Open this week knows about the Serena Williams episode. Serena, who yelled "Come on!" as she unleashed an inside-out forehand to Stosur's backhand, was charged with "intentional hindrance"--meaning that her yell interfered with Stosur's attempt to return the ball. First of all, I agree with the call--grunting while hitting is one thing, but blatantly yelling words while the opponent is running down the ball is another. Either way, the call was controversial.

What ensued, though, was utterly disgusting. Serena, over the next 10-15 minutes, repeatedly glared at and yelled at the chair ump, saying things like "I truly despise you," "You are unattractive on the inside," and "Don't even look at me in the hallway, you don't want to look at me," which to me seems like a not-so-thinly veiled threat of abuse. Serena was then charged a code violation for verbal abuse.

For Serena, this is nothing new. Remember this? And Serena is still "on watch" from that incident, which means she needs two clean years of tennis to avoid being banned from future grand slam events. Well, she juuuust made it, I guess, because the USTA only fined her $2,000 for her behavior at the match. In any other sport, jawing at the officiating crew in such a manner would result in an immediate ejection, perhaps a suspension (without pay) from a game or two or many, and maybe even a fine on top of that. Serena was charged $2,000, with no "repeat offender" punishment, no suspension, no ejection, anything.

Here's how laughable Serena's punishment is: in the 73 minutes that match lasted, Serena made $900,000 for being the runner-up. That means she made $12,329 PER MINUTE in that match. Which means that during her tirade, which lasted 10 minutes or so, she made $123,290, and was fined $2,000. So she netted $121,000 for her outburst. Hell, maybe we should all start yelling at USTA refs!